Moved to Massachusetts about 3 years ago to go back to school for my degree. I graduated in May of this year. I’m originally from the Midwest and have been told I sound southern when I talk. I promise I am not from the south.
If you are looking for the stereotypical girly girl, that’s definitely not me, so you may want to look elsewhere. I’m pretty much a female guy. I hate romantic comedies ( they’re boring), I love action, fantasies and sci-fi I absolutely love horror movies. Marvel is hands-down better than DC, though Aquaman is a huge improvement for them and I will fight anyone that claims Die Hard isn’t the greatest Christmas movie ever made. I love watching things that explode, get blown up or otherwise get completely destroyed. Many people watch ASMR videos of soap-cutting, icing cakes, whatever, I watch things go boom. I’m also not the type to order water and salad at a restaurant. I love burgers, pizzas, steaks, ribs, and am mildly obsessed with bacon. So, no I am most definitely not vegetarian or vegan, if you are that’s fine, but please don’t try get me to become one as well. Don’t message me with all that pro-vegan, meat is murder BS, that’s annoying and I’ll just block you.
Now, I’m not saying I don’t have a feminine side at all, it just doesn’t come out very often. I get ready for work in under ten minutes each day, if I am going out somewhere or have to get dressed up for something, it may take me about an hour or so to get ready (my hair is possessed by an evil demon). I own two pairs of high heels, haven’t worn them in years, and I’m not even sure where they are. I don’t wear dresses at all, I think I own two or three and I’m not real sure where they are either.
For extremely personal reason I don’t drink. I’m not going into my reasons on here, but no I am not and never was an alcoholic. That said, if we do go out, I’m not going to judge you if you do, but keep in mind, I don’t. However, if you are the type of person who has to get drunk constantly, more or less only drinks beer or liquor every day, then it’s not going to work. As I said, I have some very personal reasons behind it, but I cannot be with someone who drinks constantly. It’s one thing to have a drink or two every now and then, but it’s entirely different if you have to drink every single day and go out and get completely hammered every weekend. Also, I am definitely NOT 420-friendly, the smell makes me nauseous, if you are in even the slightest bit, please look elsewhere.
Guys, I don’t care how much you can bench press or what you can lift. Your gym and muscle pics don’t impress me. I care if you can make me laugh, if I’ve had a bad day and you bring me bacon roses (They're real, I swear). If you converse on topics other than sports or Family Guy. For all of you that insist on putting in your profile that you pay your own bills, congrats on being an adult, we all do, please don’t think that will impress someone. Also, those of you that say you are sick of online dating, don’t want to be on here, insist on listing everything you hate about a female, then don’t and stop complaining, I can't stand whining.
I also have a cat and a dog, they are my babies, in fact I usually refer to them as "my boys." If you are allergic or just don't like animals then go away, I will definitely choose them over you. I have had my dog for almost 13 years and my cat for over 8 years and you are some random person on the internet. Besides that, if you don't like animals you have no soul.
I don’t have a set idea of what I’m looking for or a certain type. I guess I will know when I meet that person. I want someone I can have fun with and share experiences with. Someone to have a picnic at midnight and watch the stars, someone to explore with. I like going out to dinner, but am just as happy to stay home and watch movies and order pizza or Chinese. I don’t do bars or clubs, mostly for the reasons mentioned above, but also because I find them boring. I want something more than that. I’m NOT looking for a booty call or one-night stand. I want something more. If we turn out to be just good friends then so be it. If it becomes something more, great, but I’m not looking for just a string of one-nighters.
Also, I’m saying this now to avoid any disappointment later on both our parts. I DO NOT want children. Mine, yours, both doesn’t matter. I am not having them. I’m done with guys wanting just a baby mama or already have 2 or 3. If you want children, please keep looking. If you already have them, I don’t want an insta-family, so please look elsewhere. I may sound like a ****, but at least you know.
So if you read all of this and decide to message me, please say more than “Hi” or “Hello.” I’m sure you can come up with an intelligent message that’s more than one word, bonus if it makes me laugh.
Conversation Starters (i.e. what you'd like to do on a first date...)
First date is tough because there is so much we could do. I guess it would depend on the person and the time of year. Ideally somewhere we could talk and get to know each other. Movies are out, because you're in a dark theater and can't talk to each other, or at least not without irritating the people around you. Also, movie theaters are just awkward for a first date. Dinner or lunch is okay, but it's hard to talk to each other when you're eating. Coffee is always good, but could also do something more adventurous like bowling or mini golf.